Team Janitorz are arguably the best team in the league right now. Stable, dangerous, and emotionally charged in the best (and worst) ways. They’re passionate, loud, and occasionally volatile, but somehow, it all fuels the machine. They don’t just win. They vacuum the map clean, remove your ability to compete, and toss your body in the dumpster before the second half even starts. There’s full map control and the quiet hum of inevitability almost every time you play them.

And then there’s Team Goons, who play like a group of monkeys with monitors. They run around, peek every dumb angle, slam into walls, and turn every round into a Cirque-Du-Soleil show. They’re not low on strategy, if running around like it’s Outlaw CTF is a strategy. It’s like watching the bottom of the evolutionary ladder try to play Call of Duty 2. Every now and then, the chaos lands and they fluke a round by pure accident, but give them any map that demands structure (especially the heavy-sided German ones) and they crumble. No discipline. Just free rounds flung across the server like they’re handing out flyers.

Then there’s 1200, the Goons’ designated scope and resident glitch gremlin. His entire game plan revolves around abusing and camping headshot angles and hoping you don’t clear spawn. A one-dimensional freak with no plans to change. If Goons takes rounds, odds are he’s the reason why, and it’ll be slimy. The man is an HLL legend and no one can take that away from him, but his whole game gets nerfed through the ground by Cod2x. Expect this man to drop 20s like it’s a big mac meal. (Empty Calories)

MAP ANALYSIS

Burgundy: Arguably one of Goon’s best maps where they can rely on 12 to frag out, and they can run around on German and fling shit at the wall until it sticks. But unfortunately for them, there’s not a world in which Janitorz doesn’t ban that map.

Dawnville: Both teams like this map, and will most likely let it go for the decider (So that no team instantly starts on German).

Matmata: Most likely Goon’s best shot at an upset win with Janitorz sub-par performance against X6 in Week 8.

In conclusion: with three matches running at the same time tonight, this one’s likely to draw about seven spectators. I won’t be a thriller. It’ll be a 2-0, wrapped up before anyone realizes it started. Janitorz will whip out the mop and clean up shop. Blink and you’ll miss it.